Tag: fear

Exhausted

Exhausted

From the

Constant

Pull.

Reflecting

On

These months

We’ve

All

Shared

In shutdown.

Like a fighter –

Punch

Drunk –

I struggle

To come

To my

Senses and

See

And

feel

How Beaten

We’ve been

By the

Storm

That’s hit us.

Scared and

Jelly-like

I’m terrified by the noise

Of

This passing

Juggernaut.

What has it done

to us?

What can it do?

Can I rise

Up

Again, to stand

And

Face down

This

demonic

Challenge

to all we

Held dear?

Have I understood

the

Challenge

it has

Brought to all

that can

Be

shaken?

Have I learned

The bittersweet lessons

This trial

Has come to

Share?

Will we rise
Together,

Refined?

Poem

There is pain

In these dreams

And rejoicing.

And I don’t

Know

How they got there – in my head and

Heart?

How the plain terror of them

That once was firmly in residence – but is no more –

Has disappeared?

Where has it gone?

And why?

I don’t deserve it.

And I did nothing – as far

As I know –

To make it happen

And this makes it even more precious

And

True.

For most of the Church?

This must be true for most of the church (in the UK).

James 1:22 in the Voice translation is like water to a thirsty soul for anyone who is puzzled by the following conundrum:

 

  • we go to church a lot
  • we speak about Bible knowledge as if it is the paragon of virtue
  • yet we don’t practice some of the most active bits: prophesying, casting out demons, healing the sick and “raising the dead”

It struck me as I read this that we are being deceived! The sharp cutting edge of the church – its super-natural sharp edge is being worn out, ground down by a load of heavy Bible teaching that somehow takes the edge off the ‘dunamis dynamic’.

 

It’s time we woke up, us old sleepy heads and got with the programme!

 

Young people (and some older) are indeed getting with the Programme and are on the front foot. Taking the power of the Spirit, in love to the front doors, the station platforms, the bars, the clubs, the streets and the hospitals and front rooms of people – our friends who don’t yet know, or haven’t yet tasted the “sweetest of Loves”. This power cuts through the religious stuffiness of the “let’s all meet behind closed doors” mentality, until we feel strong enough to go out…(and we end up seeing it never happen, because somehow the teaching seems to make us full of cotton wool comfort, not realising it is anaesthetising ourselves from the sharp pull of the Holy Spirit into an action and love filled “movement” of the Holy Spirit.

You see, He is always moving (no-one knows where He’ll go next – unless of course, you are listening, as John says in his revelations: “to what the Spirit is saying to the churches…”!).

The willingness to live on the frontier of our self-knowledge, on the edge of our understanding is rare – the willingness to take a risk, a punt on being wrong with a prophetic word, or of having the door shut in our face, or of failing to find the words when faced with anti-christian sentiment is cushioned by the motivation that drives us forwards – the Love, the Love of Jesus.

He is our motivation, this love must be our driving force, even if we get it wrong! It doesn’t matter, even when we fall or fail, it doesn’t matter. God looks for the heart, not the “success rate”! He grades us not by the level of souls won, but on the fire of love in our heart….He promises to give us what we need, so much so that we can afford to “give away our coat, if we have two!”. Meaning we can afford to give away anything (the gifts, the river of life, the river of the Holy Spirit) so that the Presence and love of God gets out. We can give away our whole lives to this and yet still get replenished, filled and “more than enough”.

I sense He is calling me, you, all of us Church-dwellers out from behind the walls of the church, to come out from behind our sofas (“oooh! the world is soooo scary”) to an adventure of Love. Into the lounges and dwellings of those around us, the neighbours, the workmates, the colleagues.

To love them well, to put their needs first, not ours, to put aside our judgements and our fears and to bring the flow of His fire to them – healing for mind soul body and spirit. Restoration of friendship, of finance or family, repairing broken bodies – He can do everything – everything!!!

James 1:22
The Voice

Put the word into action. If you think hearing is what matters most, you are going to find you have been deceived.